pissing contest

January 29, 2012 § 4 Comments

   C is in a foul mood.  Work shit.  Anyway, had I known about his day I would not have volunteered to drive to Brantford with him.  Well he was telling me about his really shit day.  Me making sympathetic sounding stuff come out of my mouth while wondering why the fuck did I not ask about his day BEFORE being stuck in the car for over an hour with him?  He’s funny when he is pissy though, because he really tries to get a good swearing rhythm going, but it is something he seldom and it always sounds so forced.  Anyway, on our way home C feels better.  Then this guy is driving really aggressively and getting him all wound up again.  Stupid fucking prick, after all my pretending to be listening finally was paying off.  Lots of trucks on the road, this prick not oonly tried to overtake Chris from the inside, but off a fucking exit ramp lane.  C would not let him in, and the dickhead had the gall to honk his horn and flip us off.
   Now that could have been the end, and would have, but the guy made a point, once he was back on the road to get behind C, and not just tail gate, no.  That guy was so far up our ass I am pretty sure it qualified as a threesome.  Anyway, lucky us, he went off on the same exit as we did.  C pulls into the parking lot of the LCBO, and this guy follows us in.  Fine, I get out, picked up a bottle of rum, out I go, C is still fuming in the car watching this guy who does not take a parking spot but is sitting in the middle of the parking lot.  C goes to pull out and this fucking prick pulls in back of us and stop and honked his horn.  Now C has a temper.  It burns very slow, but once ignited…. yeah, he has a temper.  He laid on the horn.
   “Big tough guy behind the wheel…” stupid stupid man yelled.  Now see, there are some things that do not go down well with C.  Accusing him of cowardice is a big one.  Well no guy likes that, but C has the size and temper to back it up.  Me…. my common sense over-rides my bruised ego ALMOST all the time.  So C is out of the car, and the guy drives to the next row of cars over, still shouting on C to “come on tough guy”… taunting while inside his car a block of cars over.
   “I’m here, where are you?  In your car?  Who’s the big tough guy behind the wheel now, fucker?”  Eventually the guy drove off and C got in the car.  “Shit that was stupid.”  He said it for me.  Hamilton boys, they could have a handy baseball bat if they are picking a fight.
   “Feel better after winning the dick war?”
   “Actually yes.”  He’s a bit retarded I think.
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